Archive for the 'Parenting'

Yesterday was HOT! 95 degrees and humid - luckily there was a good breeze. Thunderstorms rolled in around late afternoon. As the sheets of rain started to descend I took my children onto our back deck. They were so excited to play in the rain. They danced, splashed, looked up at the sky, caught raindrops with open mouths. They were not just enjoying themselves…they were JOYFUL. Their whole beings radiated happiness and excitement. It made my heart happy.

So I thought about what makes me joyful and here is my shortlist…my children. Even when I am frustrated or overwhelmed (yes, I feel that way too) my heart swells. We recently had family photos take and I noticed that I look better in the photos with my children. The kids make me look good (wink) and I am joyful when I am with them. Joy shows on your face. Just like being angry, you can’t hide it.
I am joyful when working my business. Whether working with a client, writing a blog post, or planning future projects, I am enjoying where I am at and what I am doing. I have decided to focus on what I LOVE doing in my business more and focus less on what frustrates or overwhelms me. So moving forward I will pay someone to manage my web site since that is a source of stress for me. And yes, we can all do everything but why do it when that task sucks the joy right out of your work or day or life?
When what I am doing is no longer enjoyable, I take a break until I can return to it without frustration. Of course there are certain aspects of our work or business that we like less than other but if I can focus on the result of my actions which will bring more joy instead of the doing which may be boring or frustrating I will get the job done. For the tasks that always cause frustration or overwhelm - I pay someone else to do them.
Finally, the life I am continuing to create for my family brings me such joy. I didn’t know I could have such joy and contentment as a divorced mother of two running my own business. It didn’t just happen that way, I actively created it. I decided on what I truly wanted present in my daily life - love, happiness, peace and contentment. Then I looked at what was keeping me from what I wanted. Then the rest was up to me to change the way I interacted with my ex, my family, my children and my business. Small changes can have a large impact. So as I sit on my back deck, enjoy the early morning with a cup of coffee and the birds chirping I know I have a lot to be grateful for!

Now I ask you…What makes YOU joyful? Are you content in your life? What is it about your work that you enjoy most? Can you do more of it?

If you would like more info on this topic, contact me and we can set a time to chat..

Father’s Day always brings to mind my own father although he is no longer with us on this earth. It is not with sadness but with great peace that I think of him. I love to remember him at his best - the ways he showed up for us in a BIG WAY everyday. The hours he spend helping me with Latin and algebra homework, the 5:00 AM fishing trips, the nights spent stargazing. And yes, for my purposes here, I am leaving out the times he was not a great Dad.

As a parent, I now know it really is all about those little moments. I see my brother walking in those footsteps - it is such a beautiful sight to see him wrangling with skill his three little ones, taking the time to embrace the learning opportunities that arise and all done with such love. Truly amazing!

Remembering my father and watching my brother also has taught me the importance of good men in the life of a child. I am so happy my children have such a strong role model as my brother. My son will learn what it means to be a good man, loving and caring, strong and proud with that sense of inner knowing of how to do the right thing. My daughter is learning what a good man looks like, what expectations to have of the men in her life now and as she grows up. What a gift to give children on their journey to becoming fabulous grown ups!

As I embrace fully my single parenthood, I remember my father more often. I try to see things from the view of a patient grandfather and think “What would my Dad do”. So when the baby cries for no reason I remember “It’s ok for babies to cry sometimes - it makes their lungs strong”. When it rains I remember the times my Dad took us out to play in the puddles without care for staying dry or clean and I try to let go and give my children those opportunities - those little moments of joy.

So whether you are a Mom also playing the role of Dad or a Dad - I hope your days are filled with little moments of joys

What is in a name? I have asked myself this question many times over the past 18 months. When I first was faced with getting divorced my initial reaction was ” of course I am going back to my maiden name”. I liked my maiden name and why would I want to keep a name that held such negativity for me? Then the little voice of my then 4 year old said “you mean you won’t be part of my family anymore”. I was dumbstruck.

So I decided to wait - it takes time to have a baby and finalize divorce so I had some time.

My son was born and my daughter, then age 5, again worried that we would not all be family if my name was different. In her mind the name is one of the ties that binds family together. And she is right. So I waited a while longer.

The divorce became final and we all adjusted to our new beginning. I opted for the right to change my name but did not take action.

Now a year later I revisited the “name” issue as I was feeling rather like a split personality. Immediately following my husband leaving I started using my maiden name in general use, not on anything official. So I found myself using Walsh some times and Powers some times - I was confusing myself! I gently discussed with my now 6 year old how she would feel if we did not have the same name. Her position had not changed but mine had. I no longer cared about my name and who it attaches me to by past affiliations of marriage.

My top priority is to love my children and do what is in their best interest. I find that if it is in their best interest, by default, it is in my best interest as well. Making sure my daughter feels secure in my love and attachment to her far out weighs any need I had to disassociate from my ex-husband.

So I enter this part of my journey moving forward for myself and my children as Kate Powers.

It has been a while since I posted anything on the blog and I would like to explain why. As a life and business coach, I work on my own personal development on a daily basis. On November 16, 2008 I experienced an unexpected life disaster. At that time I was forced to close things down for a while as I took care of myself and my family. During the past year and a half I am excited to say I have been able to heal from the devastation I experienced.

Actually, I have done much more than heal. Because I allowed myself the space and time to take care of myself I have come full circle with many of my own personal issues and am all the better for the experience. In these past months I have been diligently fine tuning my technique and testing on my own life. To my clients who stayed with me despite my own personal turmoil - Thank YOU! I am grateful to you for showing me the value of what I have to share.

I can in all honesty say I am now living a life I love. I look forward as I step into this segment of my journey now as a divorced mother of two to continue implementing the tools and techniques that allow for greater happiness and contentment. I invite you to join me as I RELAUNCH my business,

Today is the day to begin your personal journey! CLICK HERE

As a Mamapreneur, there are times when things just don’t go as planned and our families suddenly arrive in the middle of our business.

This recently happened to me (not the first time) and thought I would share the experience in case it might be helpful to you.

I was offered an opportunity to be the featured guest for a teleclass that was to run at 8PM.

I was prepared for the call, excited and looking forward to the opportunity.

7:15 PM - I start Abbi’s bedtime routine to have her tucked in before call time.

7:45 PM - Abbi is tucked in, teeth brushed, stories read - quiet time!

7:50 PM - I join the call and began welcoming the guests

8:10 PM - Abbi joins me and begins asking me questions, playing with noisy toys and doing anything she could to get my attention.

So what is a Mamapreneur to do…- I acknoledged the situation - no point in pretending there is not a noisy 4 year old joining me.
- hold my breath until I turn blue - just kidding but you get the idea.
- use the opportunity to show others how to work around family situations just like this one.

How did I do that, you ask? I used the situation as an example to those on the call and a reminder to Abbi. I have a system for work phone calls that need to be I had explained to Abbi that I had a work call at 8:00 PM, we had one on one time prior to my work call and if Abbi is quiet during my work call we will have more one on one time following my call.

This statement immediately caused my 4 yr old to scurry into her room and play quietly for the next 40 minutes while I finished the call.

Here is the clincher - KEEP YOUR WORD! As soon as the call was finished I checked on Abbi who was coloring in her room - waiting for me. We colored a picture together and talked about why she was so disruptive then quickly moved onto how proud I was that she was such a good girl etc.

Of course, next time I would probably get a babysitter (my husband works nights) for 1 1/2 hours and do the call from my van in front of the house - LOL, another great Mamapreneur secret.

If you would like more info on this topic, contact me and we can set a time to chat. Oh and background noise IS accepted :O)

So the latest buzz is Miley Cyrus’ photo shoot for Vanity Fair. The whole situation infuriates me on several levels and there are so many people to blame from the photographer, parents, managers, Disney (have they made a public statement yet?) along with the media that perpetuates the chaos.

As the mother of a 4 year old, I am very cautious about what is on my television. When we watch TV, it’s PBS or appropriate on demand shows so I can monitor what my daughter sees.

Of course, I am not with her every hour and she has sleep-overs with friends and cousins. Much to my dismay, Abbi has watched High School Musical and Hannah Montana during such sleepovers. So what is the big deal if my 4 year old is a Hannah Montana fan? The problem is Abbi, at age 4, is too young to differentiate the behaviors she sees and how she should act. Young children learn by mimicking the behaviors they see. Didn’t we all learn from Britney and Christina that working for Disney does not make you sweet or innocent?

You may think I am over protective by thinking these shows are inappropriate for a 3 or 4 year old. Yesterday’s photo of a half nude, 15 year old child all over the media — who happens to be the most influential media figure for the tween age group down to school age children — makes me hold firm to my beliefs.

As a Mom, it is my job to protect Abbi’s innocence; being strict about what she sees is the greatest way to do so.

It’s not about the shoot being “beautiful” or “artistic.” I was an art major - I get it - but what I don’t get is anyone thinking a 15 year old child posing half bare is appropriate, is in the best interest of that child or the children Miley Cyrus is such an influential power over.

I must say, I will be sure to make it perfectly clear Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana is banned in my house!

Sorry, Abbi, no sleep overs for a while. Mom has to do what Mom has to do.

I had the opportunity to spend some time downtown with my daughter. We enjoyed walking through the Boston Public Garden full of budding trees, tulips and daffodils as well as a ride on the Swan Boats. It was so nice to see that Boston still has such great resources for families to enjoy the day and have it not cost a fortune.

What have you done with your family to celebrate the arrival of spring?

I look forward to your comments.

Today is the Boston Marathon and all weekend the city has been
flooded with thousands of runners and their families.
I can feel the energy, excitement and emotions as they wait out the
couple days before the “big run” today.

Right now as I am writing this runners are boarding busses to
Hopkington with their running clubs.

So how is this relevent to you.

Well, running a marathon is like running a business. It take a
thougth for the concept to be born for both a business and running a
marathon. Both take months, sometimes years of planning. Both take
a willingness to make changes in your life. Both take a willingness
to grow personally. Both take a commitment to the goal and
perseverence to continue when it is difficult.

Many people decide to run a marathon because they were inspired by a
person or event. I ran a marathon in 1997 in memory of my
grandmother who was horribly crippled by osteoporosis for over 50
years. I figured if she could struggle so hard just to walk, I would
run for her. That was over 10 years ago and I still remember it
vividly.

So what has inspired you to:
- start your business?
- make a life change?
- do something different?

Email me at Kate-at-askcoachkate.com and let me hear YOUR story!